EMPTY. USELESS. WORTHLESS. LONELY.
These are words I sometimes hear women say about their lives. These women are industrious, active in church, raising children, working on jobs and careers, devoted wives, sisters, daughters and friends. I sometimes struggle with these feelings myself.
As an active woman, I enjoy staying busy and occupied. I don’t like to stop until the chores are done, the house is clean and the yard is mowed. But these things never bring value; on the contrary, they often wear me out, get me bored and overwhelm me. I’d simply rather take a nap than do that routine again. I have a friend who always prays and studies; she rarely has time to clean. I also heard of a man that prayed 6 to 12 hours each day, neglecting his sleep. How could I ever do that?
I have witnessed overwhelmed women with tears in their eyes, frustrated because of lack of value. It’s a fine line that often can dip into depression. (I wonder if many men have these thoughts). I have these feelings daily but I must remember to go to the rock where He makes my feet like those of a deer, enabling me to go onto greater heights.
Proverbs 1:9 says, “I wear a garland of grace on my head because I am listening to my Father’s instruction …” I wear it proudly, not because of anything that I do or value that comes from self but because of Christ who is in me.
I do what I can when I am able (daily prayer, bible reading, scripture memory, journaling, volunteer, loving, helping, fellowship) so that when I am not able (distracted, lonely, desperate, feeling useless and depressed) I know that I have done all that I can.
The enemy creeps in on me. People talking cruel about me at work, or perhaps I don’t have a job or my job is no fun. He still knows the plans He has for me, plans for wholeness and not for evil, plans to give me a future and a hope.
But I missed that promotion, my teenager is partying, I’m a failure as a parent. Many of us have loved ones that recently passed. I’m a struggling, single parent. My loss is more than I can bear, what good is my life, I’m not happy, where can I turn. Constantly we must turn to Him. He showed us His love for us in that while we were still sinners Christ died for us.
For the sake of Christ I am content with weakness, insults, hardships, persecutions and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong. How can I give to others when I am so focused on being miserable? Like the Israelites or the apostle Paul, we are sometimes called to wait.
So get creative and cheer up. Although we don’t all have the perfect life/house/family/job, I know beyond the shadow of a doubt that for those who love God, all things work together for good. It is no longer I who live but Christ who lives in me, for I am God’s workmanship created in Christ Jesus to do good deeds, which God prepared in advance for me to do.
Thus, I am in the perfect place and God is working in me. He promised this and I rest in it.
Even though I fall short and am sometimes confused about God’s plan for me, I can trust Him if I search and wait. He longs to be gracious to us, He rises to show us compassion; the Lord is a God of justice, blessed are all who wait for Him.
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